Year in Review-40 questions to learn about my past year!

YOUR 2014

• 1.What one event, big or small, are you going to tell your grandchildren about?
•  I ran a 1/2 marathon this year. It was my first race ever and it took me 3 hours to complete, but it was a huge accomplishment that I will forever be proud of!
• 2.If you had to describe your 2014 in 3 words, what would they be?
• Fun, Trying and Different
• 3.What new things did you discover about yourself?
• I discovered that I carry my stress with me and I try to take care of things on my own and I can't always accept help. I have also learned that when provoked I seem like I am a lot angrier or defensive than I really am!
• 4.What single achievement are you most proud of?
• Running. I am proud of the fact that I never ran (not even in school) and now I know that I can run, and continue to do so!
• 5.What was the best news you received?
• That we weren't moving to WI after thinking that we were for a week!
• 6.What was your favourite place that you visited in 2014?
• The Smoky Mountains for the second time! We went in 2011 too, but the boys were younger then. It was a really nice cabin and a fun time all around!
• 7.Which of your personal qualities turned out to be the most helpful this year?
• My friendliness.
• 8.Who was your number one go-to person that you could always rely on?
• Matt, which is to be expected since he is my husband!
• 9.Which new skills did you learn?
• I started to learn Italian, lifting weights to a small degree and how to be an advocate for my children at their school.
• 10.What, or who, are you most thankful for?
• I am most thankful for Jesus Christ dying for my sins. On Earth I am thankful for Matt, Bruce and Levi and many friends and family too.
• 11.If someone wrote a book about your life in 2014, what kind of genre would it be? A comedy, love story, drama, film noir or something else?
• I think my life would always be somewhat considered a comedy. I guess I would say a Romantic comedy?
• 12.What was the most important lesson you learnt in 2014?
• To stretch before you run and to take protein too! Seriously!
• 13.Which mental block(s) did you overcome?
• I am still working on it, but other peoples opinions of me! I have been trying to not care what others have to say about me!

         14.What 5 people did you most enjoy spending   time with?
Matthew, Betsey, Rachel D. (although this year we didn't get to spend as much time together), Bruce and Levi

• 15.What was your biggest break-through moment career-wise?
• Since I am a stay-at-home-mom I will say that my biggest break-through was both of my kids going to school for the first year and I had to learn to be my own person again!
• 16.How did your relationship to your family evolve?
• As a mom I became more calm. As a wife I became more calm. As a daughter I became more calm and so on and so on! I guess I would say that I have become a more calm person all around and that has helped!
• 17.What book or movie affected your life in a profound way?
• The Bible
• 18.What was your favourite compliment that you received this year?
• That I was a good nursery boss! Also that I am a good mom and a good friend.
• 19.What little things did you most enjoy during your day-to-day life?
• I enjoyed drinking coffee with my husband. I also enjoyed the few lunch dates I had with friends and running almost everyday since May.
• 20.What cool things did you create this year?
• I made a few wreaths, a few paintings and a few canvas pieces.

• 21.What was your most common mental state this year (e.g. excited, curious, stressed)?
• Most days this year I was happy!
• 22.Was there anything you did for the very first time in your life this year?
• I already mentioned it, but I ran a 1/2 marathon and a 10k! 13.1 miles is a lot to learn how to do when you had never run before. I also joined a gym!
• 23.What was your favourite moment spent with your friends?
• Call me crazy, but I love AWANA! I love AWANA for the friend connections made and the kids.
• 24.What major goal did you lay the foundations for?
• Running 13.1by miles. Can you tell what some of my year was focused on?
• 25.Which worries turned out to be completely unnecessary?
• Matt and I went to Myrtle Beach by ourselves and left the boys with Rachel and Bella with Tina. I was worried that the kids or Bella would misbehave.
• 26.What experience would you love to do all over again?
• I would love to go to the mountains again for the third time!
• 27.What was the best gift you received?
• I can't choose one. I cherish all of the gifts that I get!
• 28.How did your overall outlook on life evolve?
• I have always had a pretty sunny outlook, but I think that since I have been free mostly this year I was even sunnier for the most part. And skeptical of people too.
• 29.What was the biggest problem you solved?
• The kids not getting along! We gave them separate bedrooms for the first time ever.
• 30.What was the funniest moment of your year, one that still makes it hard not to burst out laughing when you think about it?
• We have so many funny moments in this house that I can't pick just one to be the top. Most of them lately involve Levi because he is so cute and funny!
• 31.What purchase turned out to be the best decision ever?
• My gym membership is what I would have said this past summer before school was in. Now I would say that my running watch and Matt's running watch would be the best purchases!
• 32.What one thing would you do differently and why?
• I would have to say that I would have procrastinated less this year if I could take that back. Here I am with 2 days left in the year and I am still procrastinating about small things.
• 33.What do you deserve a pat on the back for?
• I honestly will say that I don't think I deserve a pat on the back for anything. God gets all of the credit for the things in my life that are good and the glory too.
• 34.What activities made you lose track of time?
• I risk the sound of being an obsessed running junkie, but running or going to the gym! Also playing games with the boys, when we play board games I think 30 minutes have passed and next thing I know it has been 2 hours!
• 35.What did you think about more than anything else?
• God and whether or not I am doing the right things for Him. Also Matt and the boys and whether or not I was being the wife and mom that I should be and if I was being a Proverbs 31 woman or not.
• 36.What topics did you most enjoy learning about?
• Football. I have liked football for quite some time now, but there were so many things that I didn't know about football until this year! I am sure this question was looking for a more sophisticated answer or something, but I am a simple girl!
• 37.What new habits did you cultivate?
• Here we go again! Running, stretching, sporty stuff and cooking with Tastefully Simple!
• 38.What advice would you give your early-2014 self if you could?
• I would tell myself to stop using my left hand since I sprained it on January 2 and didn't know that until March. It hurt, but I kept using it and now almost a year later it is still hurting! I would have also told myself to stop eating junk food because Christmas time is totally the wrong time to try to cut that out!
• 39.Did any parts of your self or your life do a complete 180 this year?
• I got off of my bum and started to get healthier! What is funny is that I always told Matt about how lame working out was and I could do it if I wanted to, but I didn't want to! Now if I go a few days without working out I feel worse!
• 40.What or who had the biggest positive impact on your life this year?
• The other women at my church. I always have a hard time connecting with other women. I like football, I know a little about cars, I don't always want to talk about my feelings and talking on the phone isn't my favorite thing to do anymore. I fit in with my husband more than other women, but this year I got to connect with other women more and got to see that I am not the only one who feels that way about phones and sports! And, someone can be considered your friend without spending every day with them! I love my church family and am blessed with the women from there especially! Also I would say Matt! He is just an amazing husband and him and the kids help me so much to be a better person!

Christmas Letter Fun!

Every year I think that I should write a Christmas Letter to let everyone know of the wonderful things we have done for the year. Once I think it through I always decide against it because I realize that we live relatively boring lives and people probably wouldn't think our last 12 months were as exciting as I do! This year I decided that I will write about it online and if you want to relive the last year with me you can, and if not then you can ignore this! I am going to do this in a few different ways, so stay with me!




Top 10 list of 2014
10. Antonia Sprained her left hand by slipping on ice... the only patch of ice in the whole driveway.
9. Bruce turned 9 years old and Levi turned 5, we celebrated with a superhero party!
8. We got snow in NC. More importantly, we got snow for Bruce's birthday and exactly 2 weeks later we got even more snow for Levi's birthday!
7. Bruce was an Awana clubber of the year for TNT.
6. Matt hit his 13 year mark in the Army!
5. Matt coached the women's softball team at church and played men's softball. Antonia played women's softball.
4. We had our second mountain vacation in a cabin that was in the mountains this time!
3. Levi started kindergarten, Bruce started 4th grade and I started selling Tastefully Simple.
2. Antonia joined a gym in May and started training for a 1/2 marathon. Matt also trained for the 1/2 marathon (although he didn't have to try as hard) and in October we ran the Myrtle Beach Mini Marathon and we both completed it!
1. We had visitors in both September and November!


The highlights from each month.
January- Traveled home from our trip to MO, OK and AR and Bruce's birthday!
February- Snow, birthday, birthday party and a lot of missed school!
March- My birthday and the awana games!
April- Spring break and our 2nd visit to the mountains.
May- Our 6th wedding anniversary and softball.
June- Matt's birthday and Bruce finished 3rd grade.
July- Independence day and Bella's birthday
August- Levi started kindergarten and Bruce went to 4th grade.
September- Grandpa, Grandma and Aunt Sharon visited and Matt went to JRTC.
October- Matt got home from JRTC, we had a mini kid-free vacation/ 1/2 marathon in Myrtle Beach.
November- Matt's parents came for Thanksgiving and I ran a 10k in my fastest 10k time!
December- 1 year of pretty much pain free for me and more things to come perhaps!






Silly Memory Poem- I made this up on the spot, so don't judge too harshly!
January started oh so blurry as we headed home to North Carolina in a hurry. We rushed and we hurried to the truck and I fell on my bottom and said, "That's my luck!" We traveled the many hours to make it home, it felt as long as a trip to Rome! Shortly after we got back, well a few weeks or so, Bruce turned 9 and then we actually got snow! The boys were excited and Bella was too, but we had wet socks and no one knew what to do. No snow boots and we thought that was okay, but 2 weeks later we had more snow come our way! This time it snowed a lot more, so much more that we could barely open the door! A few days later it did melt away, which was lucky for us so the birthday party could stay! The rest of February is kind a blur, but March wasn't too bad I am sure! March was my 28th birthday you see,  we ate and we had dessert and chai tea. We had the awana games this month too and we waited to see if the sky would turn blue! April was Easter and spring break and vacation, so much to do this month I had no time for multiplication. Wisconsin we were told would be our new place, but after a week it got erased. We are staying at Bragg for as long as we know, but really where else would we go? May was our 6th anniversary of marriage, we celebrated, but not with a ride in a carriage. May was filled also with running and sports, and Matt and I played softball in fields, not courts! June was Matt's birthday and summer break, it was also VBS and a time to bake! July was Frisbees and fireworks fun, which was not a great month to go for a run. August was busy with school, the boys both went this year which was cool! September saw family come to say hi, and for a few weeks Matt had to say bye. October was Myrtle Beach! And also the 1/2 marathon goal was reached! November was chilly and turkey too, plus more family visited us for a few. December is just starting, but it will be so busy, I just hope I don't end up dizzy. This year was fun and a crazy one too, I took on some leadership things for something to do! I know that next year will be just as great because the love of our family and God helps set us straight!






That sums up our year a bit! I hope that you made it through the whole thing and be glad that you only had to read a made up poem and not have to hear me sing!


God Bless!

October 15, 2009

I missed the exact date and now I am 6 days off, but we have now officially lived in NC for 5 years! We moved here when Levi was 8.5 months old and Bruce was 4.5. I can't believe how fast this time has seemed to fly by. On the other hand I can't believe how much we have been through or done in this time too! I try to tell the boys that they are from Joplin just like me, but all they know or remember is from Fayetteville. I feel like Matt and I have grown a lot too since moving here! Not in height (a little in weight), but mostly as Christians and in our marriage and maturity.


Levi started walking, talking and growing here!  Bruce started school, learned to ride a bike and has started to mature here. We have gotten our first family pet (Bella) since living here and we have lived in 2 houses. Matt got his first truck here. He went to Haiti and Iraq (although he had already been there before) and got promoted to E7 since living here. I volunteered in the PTA, FRG, at church and more in the past 5 years. I went from barely going to walmart or the mall and now I can actually navigate all over the town, and if you know me well you know I am good with directions and it is a big deal for me! I got to see the mountains and the ocean for the first time, and other times after that! We have traveled back to Missouri, Arkansas, Iowa and even Oklahoma since living here too and I feel very experienced with traveling due to the very long trips that we have made! We have had a variety of visitors here too. We have had winters with no snow and 80 degrees on Christmas and a few with a couple inches or so. We had 1 winter with an ice storm and this past winter we had a few snow "storms". We have had 100 days of over 100 degrees or more in the summer and no rain, which was the first few summers we lived here! We have picked Matt up and dropped him off at midnight or around there several times. We have said see you later and welcome back several times, which sometimes was for weeks, months or even close to a year. We have met so many people here, some that we still talk to and some that we have lost touch with. We miss our families and the get togethers they have, along with reunions, weddings, birthday parties, holidays and more.


I could keep writing everything we have experienced here, but I will not! I just wanted to get a few things down that have happened in the past 5 years! Who knows how much longer we have left to live here, but we will enjoy our time here and the times that we get to be together.

13.1 miles

Around May 21st I joined a gym. I can't remember the exact date, but I know it was right around there. I knew when I joined that I was going to attempt to run a half-marathon. I had no prior running experiences except for a mile here or there on our old treadmill. When I was a kid I usually got out of running in gym class because I had asthma. It wasn't that I didn't like to run, it was just that I really couldn't breath when I did. Anyway, back to May. I couldn't run a mile. I could barely run a .25 of a mile after a week. I eventually was able to run a mile without stopping and I felt like I would never be able to make 13.1 miles. Here is a look back at the highlights of what I did when I started up to now.


May 28-     I ran 2.04 miles in 30:41.
June 2-       I ran 2.00 miles in 26:23.
June 4 -      I ran 2.01 miles in 23:56.
June 24-     I ran 2.17 miles in 21:55.
July 17-      I ran 3.20 miles in 37:46.
July 19-      I ran 4.51 miles in 52:51.
July Total- 51.94 miles
Aug 2-       I ran 5.05 miles in 57:34.
Aug 30-     I ran 6.01 miles in 1:21:30.
August Total- 68.56 miles
Sept 6-       I ran 6.56 miles in 1:32:41.
Sept 11-     I ran 3.50 miles in 41:12.
Sept 12-     I ran 5.18 miles in 1:11:29.
Sept 18-     I ran 9.49 miles in 2:09:00.
Sept 25-     I ran 12.02 miles in 2:53:03 in the rain!
September Total- 87.22 miles
Oct 4-        I ran 5.01 miles in 58:05.
Oct 16-      I ran 5.00 miles in 59:21.
Oct 19-      I ran 13.17 miles in 2:55:52 (but the official race time was 3:01:25).


I did it! I ran 13.1 miles yesterday! If you had asked me in the beginning of May if I thought I would ever run a half-marathon I would have said that was a crazy question and probably not! I had a few injuries, nothing big, but a few minor things that halted progress. I can now proudly say that I have ran 281.9 miles (at least that I have tracked) since May! I want to run a 10k, a 10 miler and another half-marathon in the next 6 months or so! I will see if I can accomplish my goal of doing my next half in 2 hours and 40 minutes!


I am proud of Matt too! He also ran his first half-marathon yesterday and did it in 1:58! He wants to run more too, but he still hates running! Ha.


So, today in the Kruse house we are hobbling, limping and groaning every time we must get up, but we feel accomplished! I couldn't have done it without God, Matt and Betsey! My father-in-law helped too by making the Nike running app a competition in a way! Prayer, music, strength training, friends, family and running, running and more running made it possible!

September is one of those...

I have a lot of favorites. I am one of those people that say that I "love" or "like" everything. On the other hand, I also say I don't like or can't stand a lot of things too... Apparently I am very complicated and I, unfortunately for a lot of people, share my opinions like I need to in order to breathe! With that said, I have no intentions to quit sharing my opinions (unless you ask me nicely not to)!


Let me start with some things I like that are on the top of my head. I like headbands, listening to music and singing any chance I can get, dancing with the music too despite the fact that I can't actually dance. I like cooking and baking, organization, re-watching the same TV shows over and over again, cracking jokes and sarcasm (tasteful sarcasm though). I like spending time with my husband, holding his hand, when he kisses me on the forehead and snuggling. I like calling the boys random names I make up (like Bruce-a-licious and Leaver Beaver) and seeing them grow into nice young men. I like to check the mail and getting phone calls and texts. I really like going to church and putting dresses on. I like the fall and the winter and the spring. I like snow and colorful leaves, flowers blooming and rain. I like to drink coffee just for fun, helping other people and being around friends.




Wow, I didn't realize that my short list would be that long! I could probably write for hours and hours about all of my random likes. I did forget the months of the year I like... January, February, March, May, June, September, November and December. And, it isn't like I don't like April, July, August or October, it is just that I have different reasons for loving the other months!


September.... Colorful leaves, the start of fall, sweatshirts, football, boots, cardigans, pumpkin smells, cinnamon, baking bread and more! Fall is just the cherry on top of the last part of the year and the last part is my favorite!

Get to know me!

I don't write in my blog everyday, but I would if I prioritized my time better! However, if you do read this I wanted to change it up and do a get to know me post that I pulled off of the internet somewhere! It is mostly for fun, but if you didn't know me too well maybe after this you will know me better! :)




1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? 
I was not named after a specific person, but I was named after a character in a book.

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? 
Wednesday...

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? 
Sometimes. I guess it depends on the day and the writing utensil.

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
I like ham and turkey both!

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? 
2 boys

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? 
Yes.

7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT? 
Hmmm, I think of sarcasm as a second language and I am fluent in it!


8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? 
No!

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
 Maybe, but I would rather skydive.

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? 
Special K with chocolate

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? 
It depends on the shoe, but most of the time I don't.

12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? 
It depends on the content!

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? 
 I usually don't care for ice cream, but if I crave it once in a while then I like peppermint ice cream from Braums (which we don't have of those around here)!

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? 
Hair and the color they are wearing.

15. RED OR PINK? 
I love pink, but I don't mind red either.

16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? 
My word vomit ability and the fact that I ramble and don't shut up.

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? 
I can't pick one. I can say that I miss all family in MO, AR, IA, KS, OK and more. And I miss Emily, Leslie, Leslie and more.

18. DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS?
1 puppy dog, Bella.

19. WHAT COLOR SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?
Currently I am not wearing any!

20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?
A strawberry nutrigrain bar.

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
The TV on something random.

22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? 
blue violet

23. FAVORITE SMELLS?
Peach, coffee, fresh cut grass and anything related to fall and winter.

24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
My husband.

25. MOUNTAIN HIDEAWAY OR BEACH HOUSE?
Mountain hideaway for sure.

26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? 
Football, NFL and college.

27. HAIR COLOR?
Dark brown

28. EYE COLOR?
Hazel. They change from greyish to green to a tan like color. It depends on my mood, clothing color and the light.

29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
No, I love my glasses and embrace my inner nerd!

30. FAVORITE FOOD? 
Cheese.

31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? 
I don't watch scary movies, so happy endings.

32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? 
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? 
Light teal.

34. SUMMER OR WINTER?
Winter!

35. HUGS OR KISSES? 
Kisses from my husband and hugs from everyone else! I love both!

36. FAVORITE DESSERT? 
Tastefully simple pound cake of any flavor. I also love no bake cookies.

37. STRENGTH TRAINING OR CARDIO?
Cardio!

38. COMPUTER OR TELEVISION?
Computer or tablet.

39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? 
The Bible.

40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
I don't have a mouse pad.

42. FAVORITE SOUND? 
Laughter.

43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? 
I can't choose!

44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
If you count from where I was born (MO) then I would say Pennsylvania, but if you count from where I live (NC) then I would say Iowa.

45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? 
I soak up random information and my memory is pretty exceptional most of the time.

46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? 
Joplin, MO

47. WHERE ARE YOU LIVING NOW?
NC

48. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR HOUSE?
I will just say that the door is red!

49. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR CAR?
Silver

50. DO YOU LIKE ANSWERING 50 QUESTIONS?
I don't mind it!

100 Miles

I started running almost 12 weeks ago. When I started running I could not do it for more than a minute and I felt like I wasn't going to make it! I was nervous and freaking out to myself about not being able to run 13.1 miles in October. I started trying to run further, thanks to gentle pushing er encouragement from Betsey and Matt! I finally could run a 1/4 of a mile without walking after a few weeks, then a 1/2 a mile and then I was up to 1 mile without walking! I was so happy, but at the same time I thought that I couldn't make it for a half marathon still. I was discouraged and I felt like this was something to keep to myself at first. I didn't want to pray about it because I felt like God had bigger things to help people with and that something like meeting a personal running goal was a selfish thing to pray about. I did finally pray though. I didn't pray to get better at running, I didn't pray to make me the best runner, I prayed that God would help me get through my run that day. I think it was 2 miles or something, but I kept having a hard time completing my run each day. I realized that I don't ask God for help very often, well, I mean for help for myself. I feel like some things are too small to bother Him with, but when I trust God with everything in my life I realize that things go much better.


Philippians 4:13
 I can do all things through him who strengthens me.


Well, today I ran 2.5 miles, which was my run for today! It wasn't a significant amount by itself, but it allowed me to hit 100 miles since I started! I have a Nike watch for running and today when I was done my watch told me "Wow, great job" "You reached 100 miles". I was surprised because I haven't been paying attention to how many total miles. I have also ran 5 miles in 57 minutes (which was my longest run). I know that there is still work to do, but I feel like this is an accomplishable goal now!




I wanted to share because maybe someone else is struggling with something too.

Never Say Never

I have never been an athletic person... ever! I played T ball in kindergarten and had to participate in gym, does that count? I didn't think so. So yes, I have never ever been athletic. I played a game of yard volleyball here or there, played some mean tether ball with my cousins at our grandparents house and may have climbed a tree or two. I have never played team sports competitively, I have never taken up running or weight lifting and I never cared to be. I am almost as klutzy as it gets... I walk into walls while I am looking at them to make sure I don't walk into them and I stub my toes a lot. I have jammed every finger and regularly peel my fingers while in the kitchen, yes, with a peeler. I sprained my wrist while reenacting Ice Age when I was 17, sprained my hand this past winter by slipping on the ice when I was trying to get into the truck and I broke my leg when I was 13 while getting on the bus! See, I am almost as klutzy as it gets, I am pretty sure it could be much worse or at least a tiny worse.

Okay, back to the point. I was never athletic and this year for some reason (maybe because my husband was coaching) I played ladies softball (church league). I wasn't great, or even good for that matter, but I played! It was hard for me to do, to stay in the whole game each week, but I did it! I also got a gym membership about 6 weeks ago. I was scared and nervous because I know I am not athletic, but I was determined to run a half marathon once my friend put that thought in my head. I am still not completely sure I will be able to run 13.1 miles without walking, but I am finally believing that it is at least a possibility. Last week I ran a total of 10 miles. I did 3 in one day with no walking! Yesterday I ran 1.5 miles in just under 18 minutes and today every treadmill was taken so I decided to get on the elliptical. At first I wanted to stop at 18 minutes, and I almost did. I then talked myself into going for the 30 minutes that it was already set for! I even put it at level 7, which I had previously only got at level 3 for any length of time. My ending time today was 49 minutes and 2.9 miles on the elliptical. I was drenched in sweat and my legs were numb feeling, but I did it. Oh yeah, did I forget to mention that yesterday was leg day? ;)

It may be a small thing, but I am proud that I have started this journey and have kept it up! Now I get to run 3 miles tomorrow without walking again... I can do it maybe definitely!

Mother's Day

As a kid I remember the mother/daughter banquets at church that we had on the Friday night before mother's day every year. The men gathered together and "cooked" the meal and served the women and children while the mother's sat together and ate and fellow shipped and we waited for door prizes.
Throughout my childhood my mom was a single mother sometimes and other times she was married, either way my grandma or another family member would help me get her a present. There was a big emphasis on Mother's day and how I should celebrate how amazing she was because she gave birth to me, raised me/was raising me and just in general how great she was. Those are more her words and thoughts than mine, but that is how I thought of the day. I went to the banquets and I even sang or said a poem a few times. I got her a card, or made her one and I celebrated Mother's day every year.
It wasn't until I became a mom that I started to really get that Mother's day was one day I could be celebrated or I could celebrate the mom's in my life, but it wasn't necessary to have one specific day to do that when we should thank our mothers and care about them daily. Same goes for my thoughts on Father's day and Thanksgiving too. I love the mom's in mine and my families lives and I am glad to get them a card (and present when I remember on time) and call them and see them when possible, but I hope that they feel loved  always.

Moving on to the mother's in our lives.

My mom, Susan. She had me when she was 24 and was single. We moved when I was 5, to Carl Junction, where I lived until I was 18 and she still lives there. She taught me how to be independent, how to stand up for myself and how to argue! She helped to make my arguing skills even better when she made, er, forced me to sign up for debate my freshmen year of HS. She is the reason I count down the days to my birthday and other holidays (and she still does as my whole family knows). We argue and fight and people think we are rude to each other, not that we aren't, but we have our own way of talking and communicating, which usually involves me talking, her interrupting and then me trying to get her attention. Without her I would be a different person than I am today. She wasn't perfect and still isn't (despite what she says), but she always will be my mom. I learned from her mistakes, do things a little different than she did and I do have things about my childhood that I would change, but she isn't perfect, none of us are, and she did what she could do. All in all I love her.

Matt's mom, Lori aka Lolli. Obviously I love her and I am so grateful for her because she is the reason that my husband, her son, is in this world. Without her, there would be no Matthew (well, our Matthew). She is a beautiful woman and I am so blessed to be apart of her family. She raised Matt (along with his dad of course) and made him the man that I fell in love with. Matt can cook, do laundry, sweep and do the household chores, although he chooses not to, and he lets me know his mom is the reason why he can do those things. They lived all over the place because they were a military family also. I look up to her and know that she has our backs. We love when they come and visit or we go and visit them. She has taught me new ways to cook, among other things! The love that she shows our family is so deep and I hope that I can one day be half of the mother in law to my future daughters in law that she has been to me! 

 My grandma, who was always like a second mom to me! She was there for me when I needed somebody and sometimes when my own mom couldn't be or wasn't there. She helped me make my valentines boxes for school, spoiled me with Velveeta mac and cheese and always had gum in her purse! I talk to her so much now and still consider her as one of my closest family members.

My Aunt Sharon. I was in family pictures with her kids, I am the one who made her an aunt and she was always there for me. I stayed with her while my mom needed someone to help take care of me, and I lived with her when I needed a place to stay when I was 19. I am so grateful for her and always remember everything she did for me, including being the girl scout leader!

My Aunt Shirley. I remember getting french fries with her, for some reason that sticks out! I also remember her telling me like it was, when I was mouthy she would let me know. She bought me a dictionary, coached me in tball and always shared her pepsi with me! When you were neighbors with your family you get chance to get close with all of them!

My Aunt Sandra. She let me stay with them in the summer one year and that was really great! She also moved to Kansas before I was fully grown and moved myself, so I remember taking trips to her house and camping on her lawn! I remember her being the funny and cooler aunt (sorry aunt Sharon and aunt Shirley, you guys weren't too bad yourselves either).





Lacey, my sister in law, Matt's sister. I am so blessed to have Lacey in my life as another example of a great mother. Although she isn't a mother to me personally, she is a mother and one that I am proud to know! She is raising our two nephews and is the aunt to our 2 boys! We don't live by each other, but the times that our families get to spend together are always great!






I also want to mention Matt, Bruce and Levi. They aren't not mother's, but they are the reason that I am a mother! Without these 3 I wouldn't be me. Bruce and Levi are great boys (even when they are misbehaving) and Matt is a great husband who does so much for us!




I also wanted to add that I am incredibly blessed with so many great moms in my life. My friends, Matt's aunts and grandma's, cousins of mine who are now Mom's too and mother's of my friends. I couldn't name everyone by name because I didn't want to leave anyone out or forget anybody, so just know that if you are a mom and I know you, I am thankful for you too!


HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY EVERYONE!

Oh pollen, why do you taunt me so?

Allergy season has struck again for me (and many others)! The pollen was in full force this morning as I hopped into my car and saw the haze of "yellow sneeze dust" as I call it. The pollen has been in the air for some days before, but this was the first attack that I have personally seen this year. Matt got home from work and decided to mow the front yard. And me, being the good wife that I am , I sat outside and swept the sidewalk and watched him. Well, it wasn't 15 minutes after when we entered the house that my eyes were swollen and watery and my nose was dripping/stuffy at the same time. I had sneeze after sneeze after sneeze come on. I started a full blown allergy attack, which wasn't in my plans for the weekend. I was worried, and I still am a little, because 2 years ago I had a bad allergic reaction to pollen. I know, I know, no human likes to breathe in pollen and it makes us all sneeze and such, but I looked like Hitch (if you have seen that movie). Matt took pictures... really he did and I think I smacked him for them.

I had asthma growing up so I thought that I was having an asthma attack when it first started. I couldn't breathe (from my lungs, not my nose) very well and I was having tight chest pains, which is how it always started when I was having an asthma attack. I had an emergency inhaler from a bad cold I had and I used that. I slowly started to breathe again. Although I did breathe again I was starting to itch all over. I went into our bathroom and looked in the mirror, I was red everywhere, which was a rash. I told Matt we needed to go to the ER quickly and we did, much to his chagrin.

We got there and they asked me what the problem was, which I am sure was just because of formality since we all knew by looking at me what was wrong. At this time it was just itchiness and a rash. They told me if it started to get worse before they called me to come back up and tell them. 30 minutes later I stood up by the front desk and I think that I probably scared them because they came right around and got an IV in my arm. My face was swollen; my eyes, my nose, my lips and my cheeks were ballooned and actually a little numb. They did test on me and the only conclusion was that it was pollen, oh yeah, and that the inhaler saved my life because that pain I was feeling was me starting to go into shock from the allergic reaction. Scary. Thing. To Hear. They didn't let me get an epi pen though, they said I needed to experience that little joy twice before I could "earn" one!
So, as my long story showed, I am nervous for pollen season because I literally don't want to die because of pollen. Don't get me wrong, I know that God is in charge and when it is my time I am ready to go, even if it was because of pollen. Seriously though, I can't even breath this time of the year without an allergic reaction to it.

I love to look at the trees, I love honey, I love flowers, I don't mind bees, but I don't care for pollen!

Romans 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

Maybe I should embrace pollen like I do other things that are exactly likable. I will have to remember this verse when I am hating on pollen and wishing I was back in Missouri where I did sneeze, but nothing compared to the NC haze (which I will have to wait until it gets worse and post a picture).

Stay at home mom when the kids are fully grown?

I have been a stay at home mom since 2008. The summer after we got married and found out that we were pregnant with Levi is when we both decided that I would quit my job and be a stay at home mom. It wasn't an easy decision, but it was one that has worked out. I do miss working at times, but I don't think that I would have traded this time for anything.

This coming fall Levi will be starting kindergarten and Bruce will be in the fourth grade. I always said that once both of the boys were in school I would go back to work. Matt has always said that I should stay at home even after they are both in school so I could be around to volunteer and help out and always be here if they need me. Pretty soon I will have some choices to make... or maybe not.

I have different things I could do. I could continue to stay home and just sit around (yeah right, if you know me you know I couldn't do that for more than 2 hours). I could finally start taking some online classes and continue to volunteer and keep the house clean and maybe become more ambitious in my cooking. I could get a job and just figure out what to do if the boys have the day off of school. I could do so many things and as of right now I am not sure what I am going to do.

I have always had a knack for some things and it has always been difficult for me to choose one! I love to take pictures and I have done that since fifth grade, but I do it more for fun than anything. I have always enjoyed writing and have published a few poems, but where do I start? I also always said that I would never want to teach, but I have been feeling more and more compelled to do that lately. So many choices. I am in no hurry to rush any decisions though, which makes me sound like I don't care maybe, but I do care and I want to take my time.

The Bible verse that I am thinking about today really helps me when I am not sure what to do or where to go.
Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.

Children are a blessing, even when they don't seem to be!

There are certain times in our children's lives that have specific names. Infant, toddler, terrible two's, pre-teen/tween, teenager, etc... They all mean something and most of us know what that is. When I hear infant I think of a new baby, one who eats and sleeps and needs a new diaper change very often! When I hear terrible two's I think to myself to just wait until the 3's hit (a little joke... maybe)! However, for me at least, there are other stages that no one tells us about. Then again, maybe it is just my oldest son who is going through this right now and he is the first and only, but I doubt that.

I remember that when I was a teenage girl I had an attitude for no reason sometime and I also remember getting irritated at just about everyone older than me. Big difference between Bruce and me is that he is a boy and he is only 9! Oh yeah, and he also only has an attitude with me. It is always hard as a parent at different times and for different reasons.

Just this morning I woke Bruce up and he slowly crawled out of bed and down his bunk stairs and then he finally made his way into the kitchen and sat down at the bar. I looked at him and asked him what he thought he was doing and his reply was, "I think you should just get me my breakfast". That sounds pretty tame I know, but it was his tone and the added knowledge that he wanted to start making his own lunch and breakfast a few months ago. I let him because he needs more responsibility. And by getting breakfast he means a bowl of cereal, it isn't like I am making him cook eggs and bacon! He will decide to get up and stomp around and grunt and make as much noise as possible before he eats.

That was just a little glimpse into what our morning today was like. Then I get to really enjoy his new found attitude when he gets home from school. He will tell me that writing his spelling words in alphabetical order is too hard and that studying for awana takes too long. He will tell me he got blue today for behavior (green is the better one) because the other kids were talking and the teacher decided to just get onto Bruce even though he was the innocent one who did nothing wrong. I will tell Bruce that he needs to help me put away his clothes and he will let me know that is too hard to do and then cry and whine like that will make me change my mind.

It could be worse and I know that the big picture is that he really is a good kid that minds everyone else and is so nice and polite (as everyone always tells me, which I appreciate it because I know that he is at least well behaved for others). Every age and stage is different for everyone else and I know that this too shall pass, but it doesn't mean that it is always easy!

A Bible verse that I try to remember everyday: John 13:34 A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.